Gay alvin and the chipmunks

Hey, taxi driver. Could you at least notify some paramedics of our location before you bounce!? After spending a half hour dragging their bags to the sidewalk and off David Seville’s property, Simon whipped out his phone (approximately the same size as him) and scrolled through the Uber app, trying to find a taxi.

Meanwhile, Alvin could feel his tummy getting worse and worse.

He continued to drive.

Alvin was cradling his belly. After that, we’ll book into a hotel and stay there until the babies arrive.”

Alvin began to break down into tears: “Simon… I’m scared.”

“Don’t be.” Simon said reassuringly, approaching Alvin for a brotherly hug, “There’s nothing we could’ve done. The taxi driver, using a button on the car’s front seat terminal, opened the left back seat door for them.

Alvin grabbed his hand and squeezed it tightly, as he felt an odd object slowly crawl out of his asshole.

“OH FUCK!” The red-hoodie-wearing chipmunk said in pain and suffering. Can we change our destination?”

The taxi driver rolled his eyes: “Alright, fine. But, I’m increasin’ the cost of the drive by 25 per cent, got it?” (NOTE: The taxi driver is from Brooklyn.)

“Yes,” Simon replied in compliance, “Could you drive us to the nearest hospital, please?”
The taxi driver nodded.

More importantly, why does a kids’ movie make us ask these questions?

When Armenian-American singer, songwriter and actor Ross Bagdasarianrecorded his first novelty single in 1958 on a personal tape recorder with the speed control set high, he had no way of knowing that, almost 70 years later (and 50 years after his passing), his innovations in the field of gimmick music would be the center of a discussion on queer expression in cartoon media.

No, when Bagdasarian recorded the uncomfortably racial smash hit song “Witch Doctor,” he hadn’t even come up with the cartoonish characters to whom he would assign the high-pitched, sped-up vocal parts in his novelty tracks.

Two rectangular objects shot out of his asshole slobbered in the male-body-equivalent to a female’s vaginal fluids. Simon approached the boxes, and, using his razor-sharp claws, cut both of them open with ease. There was brief crying from them for a moment, but as quick as the crying started, it soon turned to silence.

Because of this, he's going to kill Theodore using the femur breaker. There, there was a fire coming out of a trash bin (you know, one of those cylindered metal ones.)

The two boys and their babies approached the fire slowly.

Simon turned to Alvin, and said: “On three…. The Brooklyn taxi driver laughed semi-maniacly before the doors closed automatically and he drove off.

Simon, besides a tiny bruise on his elbow, was perfectly fine, and the bag they incased their belongings in remained intact, without any holes being opened or any material being torn.

He turned the folds over, and there lay two little chipmunks, crying immensely, surrounded by styrofoam packing peanuts, but, instead of being made of styrofoam, they were made of flesh. On November 8th, TikToker @lydiasmh posted a video Facemorphing Theodore with Ed Sheeran, gaining over 3.8 million views in three weeks (shown below, right). Alvin and Simon held hands as their offspring purged in the fire.

The video is taken from the "Alvin and the Femur Breaker (remake)" Roblox game. Simon picked up the two little rascals. They’re speciesists, Alvin.”

“Is that a word or technicality for species racists?” Alvin asked, still crying, and his voice all wobbly.”

“I…” Simon paused, “I think so…”

Alvin and Simon continued to be in a hug until a taxi arrived, parking right next to them.

The two and their packing landed on the pavement just outside the hotel they requested to go to previously.